Saturday, July 27, 2013

To beat the real thing

20 ways in which a dildo beats the real thing

1. It never goes limp on you.
2. It doesn't make you pregnant.
3. It doesn't give you any nasty rashes or diseases.
4. You don't have to make it breakfast in the morning.
5. You don't have to listen to it's problems.
6. It has a permanent hard-on and can keep going all night.
7. It doesn't give you any sh*t.
8. It will never screw another woman.
9. You never have to tell it you've got a headache.
10. You never have to fake an orgasm
11. It never stands you up.
12. It doesn't lie to you.
13. It doesn't get angry if you're not in the mood.
14. You don't feel obliged to screw it just because it happens to be erect.
15. It always makes sure you c*m first .
16. It can give you a quickie any time you want.
17. It doesn't suffer from premature ejaculation.
18. Doesn't need Viagra.
19. You can put it in the cupboard and forget it's there.
20. When you give it a bj, you don't have to swallow.

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