Thursday, February 14, 2013

Nasty humor-Loving Valentines

Loving Valentines from us Girls to you Guys

You say you would like to screw me.
You say I make you drool.
But when it comes to making love
you suck and I'd rather use my mechanical tool.

You understand how to make me moan, how to make me squirm.
But when it comes to your d*ck; it feels more like a little worm.

Size DOES matter. I don't care what they say.
So please do both of us a favor and just go away.

Making love should be grand. It should make my heart to thump.
But all I usually get out of it is just feeling you hump!

Our relationship is over, it's kaput, its at the very end.
You're a really bad f*ck. I'm moving on to you best friend.

I've had relationships before boyfriends one and two.
They're dead now, but their still better at making love than you.

You get it up, you put in, you go off and then you pull it out.
I'll never have sex with you again you sh*tty lout!

Broad shoulders you have; a small waist and a really nice firm a*ss.
But you're too much in love with yourself so I think I'll have to pass.

Having sex with you has left me empty and bitter.
I'd rather do it with the ugly guy next door . I'm his baby sitter.

I'd like to have sex with you. You're built like a big stud horse.
But you're so damn ugly; I'd have to put a paper bag over your face of course.

I wouldn't mind having sex with you. You're tender, gentle and kind.
But when someone's so ugly that it'd take two bags . that's where I draw the line!

No comments:

Post a Comment